I loved this, Namila. There’s something so real about stream of consciousness writing. It feels like being invited to sit alongside your thoughts as they appear, without filters or fences. I could feel the changes in rhythm and pace, and it made the whole piece feel alive and honest. Thank you for sharing your mind with us in such an open way. It was a joy to read and to ride along with you.
It is indeed a beautiful way to express some of the rawest thoughts and allowing them to become alive on the page. Thank you, Sunshine, for choosing to sit and feel with my writing. It means a lot.
I've been trying to organize my thoughts about this. I can't quite seem to do that too well today but also I feel the form you've used itself defies the constraints we often put on ourselves so here are my thoughts -- in all the messiness.
-This is powerful, it is a reckoning.
-Every day, we witness the world on fire while those in power refuse to act and make decisions that further degrade earth faster than before and laugh while people more vulnerable by design suffer more & more.
-You talk about death as transformation and change -- this is what I hope we are doing, as a species, changing but I just hope it's not too late though in many ways it is too late.
-Birth is violence -- I love to see this truth shared. initiation into life is not what we are/were told it is (at least what I was told it is) and to soften the narrative which we see so often in media does us all all a disservice. It takes away its power. Which is what we do when we close our eyes and pretend like everything that is happening isn't really that bad.
Kaila, thank you for taking the time to read so closely and engaging with such a meaningful interpretation. 💕I have to admit that writing these lines was a very good exercise to grieve the current state of things. Hope is still there, but at this point, everything is scattered, just like the act of writing in a stream of thoughts. It’s a style of that can be hard to follow and I appreciate your intent to sit with it longer than expected. 🦋
hey, nimila 🤍 i have always loved stream of consciousness writing, one of my first introductions to it being virginia woolf. especially in the first half of this piece, i felt like a needlehead being pulled against thread - which i feel is exactly how this writing should feel like. i can't really describe the grief i felt when you mentioned the two crows, on top of what you've already written. how do you come to terms with the finality of actual death, when new versions of ourselves emerge so unpredictably? what does it mean to have lived so many selves and to still carry them with us? what about the violence reaped by each death?
this, torn open with the flashes of imagery you felt from the horses and everything else. the mind has such an interesting way of splitting open what something means to us, and you make these tangible with your words. thank you for sharing something so close to your mind. you can tell how fluent it has become in translating raw experience to words. ❤️🩹
ryv, I truly appreciate you reading this piece so closely and taking the time to engage and feel with me. Stream of consciousness really has a way of bringing out our rawest feelings. I am glad you felt them. 💕
of course nimila ❤️🩹 i know i am not too active, but i know how intense it can be to feel so deeply and to share that with the world. thank you for continuing to make such raw work, my pleasure to witness :]
Oh yeah, powerful piece. Already noticing a theme of obliterating memory within your pieces - which makes me think of how we lose our cosmic memory when we are on Earth
Oh gosh good question. In my study I have come across the idea that the inner child holds all the memory. And once you realize access you can intentionally ask
That’s very kind of you. This type of writing has a way of speaking to and from the soul. The ending is something I couldn’t control, it just kept igniting the page.
I loved this, Namila. There’s something so real about stream of consciousness writing. It feels like being invited to sit alongside your thoughts as they appear, without filters or fences. I could feel the changes in rhythm and pace, and it made the whole piece feel alive and honest. Thank you for sharing your mind with us in such an open way. It was a joy to read and to ride along with you.
It is indeed a beautiful way to express some of the rawest thoughts and allowing them to become alive on the page. Thank you, Sunshine, for choosing to sit and feel with my writing. It means a lot.
I've been trying to organize my thoughts about this. I can't quite seem to do that too well today but also I feel the form you've used itself defies the constraints we often put on ourselves so here are my thoughts -- in all the messiness.
-This is powerful, it is a reckoning.
-Every day, we witness the world on fire while those in power refuse to act and make decisions that further degrade earth faster than before and laugh while people more vulnerable by design suffer more & more.
-You talk about death as transformation and change -- this is what I hope we are doing, as a species, changing but I just hope it's not too late though in many ways it is too late.
-Birth is violence -- I love to see this truth shared. initiation into life is not what we are/were told it is (at least what I was told it is) and to soften the narrative which we see so often in media does us all all a disservice. It takes away its power. Which is what we do when we close our eyes and pretend like everything that is happening isn't really that bad.
Kaila, thank you for taking the time to read so closely and engaging with such a meaningful interpretation. 💕I have to admit that writing these lines was a very good exercise to grieve the current state of things. Hope is still there, but at this point, everything is scattered, just like the act of writing in a stream of thoughts. It’s a style of that can be hard to follow and I appreciate your intent to sit with it longer than expected. 🦋
Art in its rawest form. Tearing open the artist from the inside to get out. A birth of one and death of another, at the same point in spacetime.
That’s what this piece made me feel. 🖤
Thank you for your fascinating words, Em. It feels in fact like a necessary renewal, just like life. 🖤
I loved every single second of this!! Thank you for such a thoughtful and profound reflection 🩷
Your words mean so much to me. Thank you for passing by 🫂💖
hey, nimila 🤍 i have always loved stream of consciousness writing, one of my first introductions to it being virginia woolf. especially in the first half of this piece, i felt like a needlehead being pulled against thread - which i feel is exactly how this writing should feel like. i can't really describe the grief i felt when you mentioned the two crows, on top of what you've already written. how do you come to terms with the finality of actual death, when new versions of ourselves emerge so unpredictably? what does it mean to have lived so many selves and to still carry them with us? what about the violence reaped by each death?
this, torn open with the flashes of imagery you felt from the horses and everything else. the mind has such an interesting way of splitting open what something means to us, and you make these tangible with your words. thank you for sharing something so close to your mind. you can tell how fluent it has become in translating raw experience to words. ❤️🩹
ryv, I truly appreciate you reading this piece so closely and taking the time to engage and feel with me. Stream of consciousness really has a way of bringing out our rawest feelings. I am glad you felt them. 💕
of course nimila ❤️🩹 i know i am not too active, but i know how intense it can be to feel so deeply and to share that with the world. thank you for continuing to make such raw work, my pleasure to witness :]
Knees imply submission.
The crows lived.
There’s now three.
One with a chicken bone, fighting the other two. Live wire.
Who you are is you. Nonetheless.
Another poker face. Imagine that.
The day before this posted I saw those horses running from the flames. Coincidences I do not believe in.
screams 150 Hz
Horses (and unicorns) running away are never a good sign. The crows, I still hear from them. 💜
i’ve found a new favorite substacker 😍
amazing work
You are the kindest, Lia. Truly appreciated 🦋
Oh yeah, powerful piece. Already noticing a theme of obliterating memory within your pieces - which makes me think of how we lose our cosmic memory when we are on Earth
Does memory come back or reset when we come to light? Thank you for reading so closely, truly appreciated.
Oh gosh good question. In my study I have come across the idea that the inner child holds all the memory. And once you realize access you can intentionally ask
I’ve saved this to read later
Really nailed the stream of consciousness concept. Excellent work.
Also that ending passage was 🔥
That’s very kind of you. This type of writing has a way of speaking to and from the soul. The ending is something I couldn’t control, it just kept igniting the page.